12 Days of Kinkmas: Day #11 – “A Kitten for Christmas”

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She kept the best gift for last.
After all was unwrapped on their quiet Christmas morning, after they had their breakfast together – coffee and blueberry bagels – she disappeared into the spare room of their first house together, pulling open the cupboard door and reaching up over head to grab the box with the red and white stripes pattern.
She returned to him waiting on the couch patiently, hands in lap, and gently sat the box down in his lap.
“What’s this?” He asked, eyeing the box suspiciously.

She knew he didn’t like surprises – and something in her delighted in this small twist of fun she was doing to him – but she nodded towards him in a gesture that said open it and see.
He did so, carefully lifting the lid with both arms to see — the contents wrapped in plain gold wrapping paper.
He sighed, the way he knew she found funny, and paid no mind to the delicate wrapping paper, tearing it free and finding –
Cat ears around a headband.
He pulled it out of the box, running his hands over the black fuzz on the ears.
She couldn’t supress the smile on her face, it spread like wildfire, her cheeks taking the full brunt of the force.
Below the cat ears was a pink collar, as soft and fuzzy as the ears, with a little silver pendant attached reading Kitten.

“Interesting…just your size.”
He placed the collar on the cat ears – there was more to come.
Below the collar was a medium sized butt-plug, sleek and black. Attached to the end of it was a cat tail, soft and fuzzy (again) with a white stripe down the middle of it. All of this bought for just $79.99 – though he would never know that.
“I…must say. I am lost for words.”
She knew this, could tell this, from just the sound of his voice. He had this tone about him when he couldn’t find the words. It was a sweet feature. Genuine and shy and honest.

She could tell he liked it though, she could see thatin his eyes, the way they lit up with mischief, his mind going a million miles an hour just thinking of the possibilities.
Before she could talk about it, before she could say what was on her mind or even address how they’ve both been wanting to explore this part of themselves for the better part of their busy year, he was already getting up, pink fuzzy collar in hand.
“May I…Or would you rather –“

She was already brushing the intruding hair out of her eyes and behind her neck before he could finish.
With the collar attached, warm and snug around her neck, she felt truly at home – comfortable. At peace. She could tell by the way his eyes were beginning to glass over at he was at the same spot she was.

He put his arm around her and drew her in for a cuddle.

Primal Creatures: Looking At The Primal Dynamic

 

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One thing that comes up often in a conversation with a reader who is new to the world (and to my blog) is What does it mean to be primal?

It’s a good question because the explanation is so much more than offering up a definition of the word.

 

What IS a Primal?

 Have you ever had a sudden urge to act on impulse, whether that be to run out in the rain, to howl at the moon, masturbate in a risky place, undress in places deemed inappropriate?

Having these raw, unprocessed, unfiltered thoughts and feelings, no matter what they are, can be classified as being primal.

It’s more than unfiltered thought though, it’s a mindset: to take on urges and impulses directly without the fear or shame or masks we wear in society.

To that end, to become primal is to strip yourself of all the barriers you might have built up over the years in place of dealing with society, and to just simply be. As you are. As nature intended you to be. An animal.

In an effort to help describe the sensation, I am going to write now from a purely personal place and keep in mind, everything I experience in subjective.

I have been primal for as long as I can remember. My earliest memory of such an encounter is when I was a teenager, probably 14 or so, and I was running around the bush here (As I grew up in the country side outside of town) completely naked. Why? I have no idea. But in this cases, I would just run, fuelled by this gut feeling, by feeling sensual and alive and animalistic.

I think later in my teen years, after a lengthy storm ravaged the countryside, I ran far beyond the reaches of my home, far from the view of my family, stripped completely naked and laid down in the mud and rubbed my cock and body against the ground to breaking point. I came over the earth, muddy and breathless.

I also masturbated in the toilets at a KFC one time because I was carried away and felt that the situation was incredibly hot. Maybe that carries into the concept of Exhibitionism but that I did it in the first place reminds me of the concept of being primal.

In a relationship, primal takes on a different turn. I recognise the scent of my kitten. Whether it is her arousal or just the scent of her perfume or her body, it relaxes me. It eases my anxiety, it soothes it. As animals, smell is a huge thing to us – it is, after all, what draws us together.

 

ANIMALISTIC DESIRE

 Have you ever felt something so powerful, so rich, that it kickstarts your heart and ramps up the andrenaline within you? It’s a feeling I can best describe as: energetic, intoxicating, you can’t sit still and you certainly can’t fight it. Maybe you’re out of control.

What you are feeling is a massive turn on and is thrilling and yet, you are afraid of it, because you can feel the immense power. You are happy to drown in it because everything around you, your body, your mind, feels on fire. This is what it means to feel animalistic, to feel primal.

If you are feeling this, if you have experienced something similar to my experiences above, you might be more in tune with your primal being than you realise.

 

PRIMAL PLAY

 Pet play, which is a form of roleplay in which the submissive acts as a pet or creature, goes hand in hand with the primal dynamic.

Pet play can see the submissive own the animal within her, while she perform such duties in the role like eating out of her special bowl, adhere to the restrictions of the leash and even vocalise as her creature, which can be sexy.

In other scenes, the dynamic can see the Dominant take on the form of the Predator while the submissive takes on the form of prey. In this scene, whatever the elements agreed upon, it is not unusual to feel possessed, to feel the hunt and for the submissive, it is not uncommon to feel fear for being the prey. Sometimes these situations can go over the boundaries of what is safe and consensual, sometimes that is enjoyed – just be cautious of one’s wellbeing at all times.

 

BECOME ONE WITH YOUR INNER ANIMAL

Though the power is all consuming, intoxicating and electrifying, there is nothing to fear. You are experiencing something not everyone can, or will admit to.

These feelings, however dark or animal they may seem, are natural and to feel them in the first place, to identify and own them, is a testament to the strength of the individual! Because we fear what we don’t understand and we fear what is purely, unapologetically animalistic.

HOMEWORK FOR THE INDIVIDUAL

 

Think of a moment in your lifetime where you might have felt primal. Write it down, come to terms with it. What were the circumstances? Where were you? How did it make you feel? And on a side note, feel free to share it via comments or through email. One or the other.

‘B’ is for Bestiality

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When I was in my early twenties, I befriended a woman – I forget from where…an app off Facebook, I think? – but something just clicked and we became friends. Over time, I learnt she fancied me. That she had the same lightning strike sex drive. You know the one. Where you can’t quite get enough. Where it’s a frenzy. This was around the time that I was struggling in a relationship because I had a frenzy sex drive and my then-partner didn’t have much of one — and because I was Dominant. So to hear this from someone else was a breath of fresh air, really.

Anyway, one night over a jovial conversation, she says to me. “Okay, so I’ve never told anyone this before”

And I go, “What? What’s wrong?”

And she says “I just wanted to get off my chest to you that I’m into Bestiality…”

And I’m stunned. I’m, what, 22-23? This is the first person in my life to say such a thing – and you know what, she has been the last. I mean, before the words left her mouth, I may as well think of the act as a myth, talked about in hushed tones in the seediest of circles. But no, this perfectly normal, lovely – and she was lovely – girl is telling me about this over the internet.

But anyway, what was I supposed to do? I’m not about to vomit. I don’t cut all ties. I certainly don’t condone bestiality for a number of reasons but I’m not going to ignore it because I feel, for those that have urges, they shouldn’t feel distanced from me or anyone else. And because, I’m curious about the appeal within the mind of others.

So we talk about it. And she goes on to describe her fantasy to me, involving a horse. And you know what’s interesting here is not the bestiality itself, but the idea that this sensitive woman is having these primal urges. Natured or nurtured, she can’t help them – and that is what I find fascinating on a purely psychological level. So we talked about how. We talked about why. We talked about society. And we talked about the community into said desire.

I was even introduced into a Bestiality-Fantasy Roleplaying site where I could talk with the community and hear stories. It was quite intriguing just reading how others interact and what they find appealing, because I don’t find it appealing at all. It’s a whole other world to me and I enjoyed seeing and meeting the people in it.

A lot of this can manifest into not actually fucking an animal, but with pet play. Butt plugs come with tails now. My kitten and I hope to introduce a cage for her in the near future. Roleplaying just doesn’t stick to the internet, we all know, with the assortment of apparel and toys, your fantasy comes alive. You get to live that out, however you want.

Anyway, Her and I eventually drifted apart, as friends do. We caught up here or there but whatever thing that fuelled the conversations wasn’t there, it was simply part of a time and a place. We did reconnect on Facebook and then on Fetlife a while back but one day she didn’t pop up in the news feed anymore and I took that as a hint to leave things be.

I guess, for me, it was about uncovering new people, new experiences and learning to accept those, even if you can’t agree with it. I don’t ever want to dissuade anyone or make anyone feel they are a freak for their interests. I do draw the line at body harm, corpses and other outlandish stuff though. But I’m not about to piss on your sense of being and belittle you.

And now because I feel like I am rambling – I feel I should say ‘Class dismissed’.