30 Days of Kink – Day #27: I’m a Day Dreamer!

Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?

I’ve been do slack putting these up the past few days – my deepest apologies to the person following this daily.

To answer the question, my non-kink interests always find their way to kinky activities. Where you there when I wrote about Ariel submitting to Ursula as a Slave in exchange for human legs? I’m a huge Disney fan! I set a path to Disneyland and World when I visited the states.

Did you ever read HERA? It was a story for a competition I created last year or the year before. In it, a group of spacefarers investigate a dormant spaceship floating quietly in space, only for them to fall victim to a erratic AI becoming conscious and developing the mindset of a mistress.

It incorporated another favourite genre of mine – science fiction – and has ties to Greek mythology as well, both things I am an avid fan of.

When it comes to writing erotica, I like moving against the grain. I find to do so makes for a challenge to me as someone creating the world in ways it will pay off at the end of the tale – but I also like to challenge the reader. It’s always nice to get an email saying ‘I’m not normally a science fiction fan, or like anime, or I don’t like rape fantasies – but this really took my breath away” – to me that’s a job successfully done.

I can’t help it either, you know? Being inspired by the world around me, or incorporating other things I like into genre. For me, it just comes naturally that I want to experiment with ideas – and there’s freedom to here because I trust readers will definitely tell me what works and what doesn’t. It’s a good place to experiment.

The long-running VALHALLA is another example. I love Norse mythology and fantasy and put both into the story around the more kinky aspects like the M/s dynamic. I actually borrow a lot from old Norse texts, lifting Valkyrie names from the Prose Edda and putting them into the story. Kára is one Valkyrie from the Prose Edda, envisioned here as a fiery soul, like a feisty middle child with problems of her own.

I know what you’re thinking though – yes, yes – enough about what you like to write about, what about your sex life? Well does psychology count as a non kink activity? I mean it IS kinky too to a degree but it doesn’t quite fit into the spectrum.

I’m interested in how minds operate and why. I’m interested in encouraging minds to break free of whatever aspect that is blocking them from that liberation. I’m interested in chipping away at armour in someone piece by piece to see what’s underneath and how we can play with that together.

There’s something really REALLY sexy about finding an aspect in someone that they never knew existed. Maybe it’s an interest, maybe it’s heightened pleasure. To break them when they say they can’t be broken.

Then it’s something as simple as walking out the door right? I walk out the door, ready to grab a coffee for the day (praise and glory be to the coffee) and all of a sudden I’m thinking how I can push kitten against this wall and making her whimper.

I’m constantly thinking about the world and the people around me and turning them into stories I can write about.

I’m a day dreamer.

The Master in Me

So here’s the thing about me.

You could say I’ve been in this lifestyle since my experiments with it as a teen, but I really didn’t start to understand the depths to which it was a part of me until my mid 20’s.

Only then, through educating myself through various web pages and through friends across Fetlife, Whisper and Collarspace did I start to understand what I was feeling.

The thing is though, I didn’t learn everything in my mid twenties. Some of it was yet to come later – like the fact that I realised the Daddy dynamic – or that mentoring a student who began to identify as a Slave made me realise my own tendencies as a Master.

A Master.

The Master in me has always been a mystery to me because it’s so far removed from who I am outside of my Sex life. The Daddy side I understand – nurturing people, friends of friends, mentoring newcomers, reading to my kitten – these things come naturally to me. But my Master side is a bit more elusive.

It’s not just because it’s not always a fit for my relationship with my kitten, that I understand. We fulfil each other in a different way.

It’s that it comes out – is triggered, I guess you could say – at random, like I’m possessed by some otherworldly being.

I remember explaining to this student this visceral mindset and their reaction being one of ‘You’re kind of a different person’. A similar reaction occurred with my kitten in an organic way, though our personalities, melding as they often do, seemed to thrive off of each other as totally different people from our softer sides.

Maybe that’s the appeal? The contrast between different lives?

But then again, as I write this – I realise a lot of the M/s style appeals to me – the symbolism and rituals, the exchange of power, the slave training – all of these are things of beauty for me and appeal to me greatly.

Like I said with my relationship with Sadism, I haven’t fully understood what this all means for me but it’s an entity that takes up rent in my head and is along for the ride.

And as always, I’m eager to hear from both sides of the coin, the Master/Mistress and Slaves-mindset, new to it or otherwise, that are out there and lurking. If you care to, please feel free to share some of your own experiences with your journey so far – either in the comments or at email!