Good Little Boy

The worse thing you can do is fight it.

I get what I want. And what I want is for you to come in my hand like a good little boy.

I know you want that too. I can feel your cock harden in my hand.

So, accept me. Let me in.

Because if you don’t, it’s only going to get harder for you from here on in.

Playing With Fire: A Daddy Dom Ramble


I’ve had a few drafts of what I want to say. I can’t figure out how to be precise with my words here. So expect some free form stream of consciousness.
I watched this show where a teenage girl was hovering her hand over an open flame, admittedly been through a lot, not to mention being a teenager in the first place. And my mind jumped to so many different tangents with the image. Experimenting with pain, sexual

Identity. Guidance. 
It kicked off this whole train of thought that is current doing the round. Which led me to writing it down here. 
I’m a Daddy. This much is true, whether it’s sexual or instinctive. Or darker. 

And I’m of two minds – one half trying to comfort this teenage girl while the other half helping her to experiment. Because experimentation, under watch, can be rewarding. So maybe my hand on hers, feeling the slight burn. No going back. Showing her that there is this whole side of things that you can practice as a form of therapy, if controlled in a healthy environment. 
And I’m not too sure why. 

I often wrestle with my animalistic impulses. I’ll shy away from the absurd because a handful of people understand and the rest don’t. 
I think the reason why this show has sparked feeling with me is partly because I was that experimental teen, dealing with pain – unhealthily at first. So when I see a teenager, male or female, struggling, I become that surrogate Daddy. Whether they like it or not. Because I can’t help it. And because my heart is too deep, or so they tell me. 
When I was first fully exploring my Dominant side, I met a teenage girl through Whisper going through a really rough time. I was 26 at the time. And she was flirtatious and sent nudes randomly. And I understood why. Or partly understood. 

I didn’t act. I didn’t want to. She was certainly attractive. Legal, if you’re mind is going there. But I could feel she was trying to justify something, her worth, herself, anything. And so I talked to her, told her politely as I could that the nude photo wasn’t necessary. 
And I don’t know why or how I came to it, but I saw her as a little sister. And whenever she texted me to vent, I would listen. Whenever she called, I would listen. 
And eventually, she stopped calling. We stopped talking, I didn’t bother her. I get it into my head I’m annoying – and a part of me felt guilty about the fact that I was even talking to her, because age. 
And age is weird. When my kitten was 16-17, I was 21. And I wouldn’t dream of dating her then….but now, it’s okay. Our minds are weird. Human, I guess. 
So when I see a teen or hear of a teen struggling, I see myself. I’m instantly transported to my days of discovery. And I guess that sparks on a transformation into a Daddy.
And I’m writing this all out because I feel like it needs to be said. I feel like there’s this sort of creep factor or age barrier that comes with the Daddy Dominant that misconstrues meaning. And I feel, a lot of the time, there’s a younger audience to my blog that needs to talk about something to a random who doesn’t know their friends or family. Who needs to hear they’re okay to experiment. 
Just like sometimes I need someone to tell me: it’s okay to feel like this. It’s an instinctual thing. You’re not a fucking creep. Even though, through writing this, I kinda feel like I am, you know?
So: the image of this girl testing the flame. It made me think of myself, it made me want to guide her, tell her things are okay. It made me want to walk the path with he while she opens the doors to discovery and sexual identity. 
This may be an 18+ blog, with mature themes, but I’d never turn anyone under 18 away. Because that person was once me. 

Lesbianism In Medieval Times

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I wonder..

I’m not the biggest historian on a topic such as this but wiki tells me homosexuality, in medieval times, was punishable by death. And because I am a dreamer, I wonder..

How many women had discussions behind closed doors. How many betrothed women shared passionate forbidden kisses with their servant girls and ended up in a clusterfuck of sheets like this:

 

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And before people wonder, I do want to say that I am not excluding men out of this equation. But it so happens I was writing a scene set in medieval times between two women and there seemed to be an underlying sexual tension. Characters tend to live a life on their own terms, I can’t control them. And I got wondering about this myself. How many tantalising secrets behind closed doors were there?

How many servants went to wake their lady and saw them in their sheer nighties? was there any sexual tension there at all? Or is this all just me on a male-wish-fulfillment rant?

It strikes me, coming from 2016, that maybe these people didn’t have the labels we do, they didn’t wake up and go “Dear me, I am a lesbian” – to them, it was just passion. Passion, love and stolen kisses. Forbidden love.

Intoxicating, sheet-soaking, forbidden love.

So I wonder. And I fantasise. And I think about this love. And I smile to myself.

Sometimes daydreams are lovely.

The different meanings of being Dominant

 

Every so often, I stop and think about what it means exactly, for someone to be Dominant. And I get so caught up thinking about myself and my past and my future and how – in the present – I interact with my kitten. There’s a good and bad aspect to this for me.
The good side is that it allows me to reflect. Reflection is good. We get so caught up in our daily lives that we miss simple truths. Or sometimes we grow. Yes, we grow in mere months. Our tastes expand. What I wrote at the beginning of the blog you can find under “His Journals” and I am sure if I read that, I would add to it…and add to it….and add to it. I could keep adding and adding to it that it drove me mad. Here’s where the bad side of it comes in.

I’m sure I could think myself to death. Part and partial of having anxiety is that you think…and overthink…and overthink. It’s like a broken record. You go around and around and around thinking and analysing and coming to the truth, only it’s not the truth, there’s always a piece of information you missed, which means more thinking and more analysing. So I am going to add upon what I’ve said about the Dominant aspect and I’ll try my best to explain it and then somehow fight my compulsive behaviour to revisit and edit. Sigh. Bear with me.

But how is a person Dominant? It’s not just that he/she can top you in bed. Oh  no. Although, to be fair, there’s that. Which brings me to my next point: There’s a Dominant for the bedroom, maybe even outside, and then there’s a Dominant for the lifestyle.

The Dominant within the bedroom just wants to top sexually. They might even want to toy with the idea of owning you outside of the bedroom, purely for a sexual thrill. Like – wearing no panties to work or choosing your outfit for you. That sort of thing.

It’s when it begins to be not just about a sexual thrill but something far richer and deeper that it wanders into the territory of the ‘lifestyle’. And this is where a D/s relationship might come into play. The Dominant that wants in on the lifestyle is the Dominant I am, to use a personal example. If you’ll allow me to be more personal, it’s not enough that I dominant kitty in the bedroom. As wild and passionate and exhilarating that is, I need more. Because that side within me wants the tender love and ownership and control of the person out of the bedroom more than it does within.

It is insane the desire that fuels me to stroke her head and tuck her in. To want to read to her (We’re currently powering through Alice’s adventures in Wonderland of a night). To teach her to build up her confidence and let go of the chains. To nurture her and be a teacher to her. It extends to the symbolism of the collar. This desire to have her wear both a social collar, for privacy reasons in the workplace, and her own collar around the house. Why the desire to collar? Because she’s beautiful, sacred — fucking MINE. (And I can’t even begin to DESCRIBE the surge of possessiveness that came through my body writing that sentence). This beautiful, soulful kitten is mine. Those tender blue eyes, her gigantic ever-giving heart? MINE. Mine to protect.

And I love that. And I want to be her guardian and protector and I want to see that cute choke-worthy neck don that collar. It’s a complicated mess of emotions.

And that, for me, is Dominance within the lifestyle. A complicated mess of emotions, ranging from the deeply loving to the deeply brutal.

Now, of course, you can’t just define Dominance down to two categories – in the bedroom and deeper. I will, however, admit to disliking the individual that poses as a false Dominant when all they really want is sex. This angers me because, to me, that isn’t right. And it’s treating this beautiful man or woman as a cheap tool to which they will use to get off. NO. FUCKING NO. But I digress.

Every Dominant out there is going to take what a D/s lifestyle means to them and alter it how they want to because it suits them. It likes…parallel universes. Right now, there could be a parallel universe where I’m not writing but rather hanging out with my dogs because I felt you guys didn’t want another long-winding post. For every direction made, another universe is created in which the opposite choice is made. It’s science fiction but it’s kinda like that, every person shapes what’s being defined by other people as D/s and Dominant — to fit their life and it’ll go on and on like this for years, long past your existence or mine.

It’s complicated, it’s messy, it’s being Dominant. So if you find a growing interest in BDSM, if these interests start to go outside of the bedroom and start materialising in your personality and in your desire towards your partner or you’re own mind, then it’s the lifestyle for you. And the journey begins.

But, of course, it’s never that simple, is it?

The Submissive Male

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I wanted to write about the submissive male for a number of different reasons:

A) Because I think Men might be reading this and still shy to speak up to me.

B) Because Men might be having problems coming to terms with the idea that they enjoying being submissive, to either a woman or a man.

C)  Because the notion fascinates me, the Dominant male and I want to open it up to any guys on here that want to talk about it.

There’s this unwritten guy code where men don’t talk about their feelings. To do so would show a sign of weakness, etc. My father possessed that rather complex point of view, brought on by his own father, which was probably brought on by his own father – and on goes this old world thinking down the line.

I don’t want to think like that. I live my life open to all sorts of experiences and sensations. And I will argue and convince over men to do so otherwise.

So if you’re a man and you’re flirting with the idea of being submissive – talk about it. If not to me, then to someone else. (Although, I’d love to hear from your perspective)

Some men might think it is gay to be submissive. That’s folly. A submissive man can be in a relationship with a Domme woman. There is nothing ‘gay’ about that at all. A man might let his mistress play with him anally. Anal stimulation does not equal homosexuality. It’s because anal stimulation is associated with gay men that it’s perceived as a homosexual thing. But so what? Explore yourself.

Furthermore, there is nothing with being homosexual. At all. So you like the same sex? So what? If you’re nice to me and others, I’ve got nothing against you. It shouldn’t be a big deal. But I digress.

I feel like many men have misconceptions when it comes to submission and sexuality and it’s a whole lot of stress. The people that worry that much about it are most likely to end up gay anyway, so there you are.

Personally, submissive males fascinate me. Their mindset fascinates me. Why they submit, what goes through their mind. The mind is a sexy thing so the whole idea intrigues me because as I identify as a Dominant, it’s kinda alien. I mean, sure it’s somewhat similar to how a lady might feel about submission but then men and women’s brains are wired differently.

I’d love to rack a submissive male’s brain. Just like a Q and A session, only relaxed. But then I am fascinated by psychology, men don’t always like talking about their feelings and it’s not like I can walk outside and strike up a conversation with one so I’m at square one in that regard.

If there are men reading this, I say this: Do what makes you happy. Wade through the fear. Follow your heart.

If all else fails, I’m here for a chat.

Religion, Sexuality and BDSM

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For some people, what I am going to talk about is going to be uncomfortable so I want to open with this: I’m using this blog as a platform for my thoughts and as such, you don’t have to agree with them. Hopefully, you can still go on to read them, maybe even have your mind changed. But these are my thoughts as I’ve lived my life and my experiences.

I was raised Catholic. I was taught BDSM and such dark thoughts weren’t proper. I come from a conservative family and should I visit my parent’s with my pet, we still have to sleep in different beds as we are not married. Though I am religious, I don’t strictly follow everything the bible tells me to. If I did, I couldn’t live an open and free life, that’s plain and simple.

But you know why this is? Because man has engineered religion that way. Now, I don’t want to spark a religion debate. Do whatever  it is that makes you happy. My belief is ancient and simple: Treat each other with kindness. Believe in God. Believe that he accepts you how you are because that is how he made you.

So, embrace who you are. Love who you are and never ever hide it.

A reader contacted me outside of my blog and expressed both her interest in being with another woman and her fear for going against her religion. Yet, that desire still remained. Perhaps I’ve been ‘unplugged’ too long, or maybe I adhere to a very loose but basic spirituality. Would God want you to be in that turmoil? I can’t answer that question and neither can anyone else but the man himself. Yet wouldn’t you think that He would want you to embrace yourself and ascend? I mean, isn’t this THE THING? Isn’t our humanity, our very life, just our time to walk to either ascension or eternal damnation? I’d like to think that the path to ascension is the one I am on, the one YOU are on. If you’re reading my blog, maybe you’re already half way there.

It angers me, you know? To find someone so afraid of taking that step, in this example – to explore their sexuality – because they were afraid of their religion, which is essentially years and years of teachings passed down from parent to child in an endless cycle of guilt and fear. Is that religion? Is  that God and love? To me, that feels like a trap. To me, I don’t stick to a lot of the bible states because I believe in my spirituality and my right to stay good and kind and just. I most certainly will mock-rape my pet but I’ll also be kind to my fellow man at the grocery store or take my time to look after my pets.

I guess what I am saying is: Be yourself. Don’t be afraid to walk that path or otherwise it will come out of you in negative ways. That I’ve learnt in my life. And doesn’t that sound counter-productive? You avoid doing what you believe is ‘negative’ and it backfires?

You were made how you are for a reason. Listen to your heart, disappear into your desires and remember to be kind. Otherwise then you really will go down the dark forest and you risk the chance of becoming repressed.

As always, my email is open 24/7. Questions, comments – if you want to, send them my way. I am always here to help and to chat. Until then, I’ll leave you with this tantalising imagery.

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