Just Write

So. I just got an email from a reader of my blog and it struck me as sad and it’s for these reasons that I want to write this piece.

If you’re going to write in to me, if you want to write in to me, there’s a couple things I, personally, want you to know and understand.

I’m not as busy as you think. I’m not running around like a headless chook, know that while I may work, I also definitely check my email daily and respond in full as soon as I can.

I don’t respond to emails to be polite to you, to what a reader described as ‘a self proclaimed fangirl’ – I respond because I want to. You must understand, I started this blog not just to share my fantasies and satisfy a part of me, I did it in case it could inspire someone as awkward as I was when I started off.

So I love hearing from people – young, old, male, female, Australian, American, Norwegian – the more the merrier. Language barriers be damned! I love conversing with people and I love talking BDSM and it’s lifestyles.

Whether you’re a fan or seeking answers or even if you a bone to pick with me about something I wrote. Grill me. I welcome all of it, criticism, friendly chatter, the like.

You’re not bothering me. At all. In all my years of blogging, in responding to the kind people that write in, I can honestly say not one email has bugged me, not one. Even if one person has a laundry list of questions, I’ll sit down and work it out with them until they’re more spent then I am. Seriously. So never ever think that YOU are the person that will be too much for me, because that just won’t be the case. Try me, I dare you!

Do you want to write but don’t know what to say? Do you feel stupid because I can talk so openly and you find it rough to? I’ve had years to process how I feel, to work to rise above my own shyness. I was the same as you in the beginning. We all start somewhere and blossom on our own time.

I will say this though – just write. Don’t worry about grammar or context or anything, just write. I honestly care not for long novel-length texts, I read every word and respond. I’ll even write a long novel-length email of my own.

Start at the beginning. Write how you feel. Find a place to start at, to get the ball rolling, and then just let it go – just write and let it loose. If it feels good, write it. If it doesn’t, write it anyway and send it.

Too many times have I read that someone wanted to write in sooner or deleted several iterations of the email they just sent – and it breaks my heart.

I know I can’t TELL people what to do. I know I can’t get people to talk as frankly as I do, but I’m writing this because I want you to know, anything you have to say, in any way, is perfectly A-OK by me and that you should not feel shame or delete what you write, because I mostly certainly want to read it. Don’t even press that delete button or I’ll slap a crop against your knuckles!

Be yourself. That’s all I ask of you. Everything else, please don’t worry. I’m not as scary as your mind makes me out to be!


5 thoughts on “Just Write

  1. I adore you, truly. I am grateful I came across your blog a few years ago. You have helped me realize that I am capable of living out my fantasies, owning them. Thank you.


  2. I am a new dominant and I also suffer from anxiety. My biggest struggle is trying to improvise when I haven’t planned anything for me and my sub to do. Do you have any suggestions on how I can attempt to get past it, or even just general suggestions on how to train a sub would be amazing. I applaud you for writing this blog. It is very brave of you and it shows that even with anxiety, you are an extremely brave and strong person and I completely admire you.


    1. If you’re feeling anxious and looking to still set tasks for your submissive, I applaud you myself – that’s quite the achievement.

      There is no shame in taking time for YOU to heal though. I’m sure they will understand if they truly care about you!

      As for improvise, I’m not sure. I’m not too good at it myself. A lot of thought goes into anything I do – I’m generally too wired to think otherwise. But! In saying that, I do think that – anything that turns you on – try working that into your life together.

      Like the other day, I wanted to see my sub put her hair pins on her nipples again – I just followed that spontaneous gut feeling. For you it might be something else.

      As for training, have a think on what you want to train her in – is it posture or speech protocols? Allow a time for you two, say an hour or so, to practice that together one on one.

      What I did was start off slow, allowing her to explore what she liked and what I liked in certain time periods so as to not overwhelm. Just until she got used to the concepts.

      I’m sorry if this wasn’t very useful – it’s hard to state specifics.

      Liked by 1 person

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