An Awkward Dominant on Hair Pulling

There’s something so delightfully wicked about hair pulling. I mean, besides the gut wrenching feeling rising from my balls to coil in the pit of my stomach, there’s this animalistic savagery to it that draws me in, there’s something so satisfying about grabbing a Fistful of her hair, turning her head, exposing her neck, sinking her teeth in.

There’s something about dragging her behind you while her strangled whimpers attempt an apology, No Siree she definitely won’t talk back because by the time I’ve finished claiming her she will have lost her voice in losing her mind.

I like the idea of the pain she could feel. I can almost sense it splintering off from her scalp, sending lightning fast jagged forks of hurt down to her breasts where it spirals around her nipples, transforming pain into maddening ecstasy.

And yet – wait. Pump the brakes.

All this occurred in my mind, for what felt like hours. In actuality, this scene, these sensations, pass in a heartbeat. Time is a fickle mistress.

Every time I get the urge to do this, to act it out, my mind relents. It gives way to this softer version of myself. I don’t know if this is an anxiety disorder matter or a confidence issue – I just feel….shy. I feel gentle. And every time we get to this point, and kitten is open to this as I am, I pause. I worry I will break her.

I know what you’re thinking – so talk to her, tell her how you feel. Ask for help in gaining confidence. I know. I know. We do – she knows my tells, she reads my face. We’re both good at communicating – it just doesn’t seem to help much. I still have pockets of time where I feel too loving.

This isn’t a new issue with men. Just yesterday I spoke to a woman whose husband struggled to be tougher with her, for the similar reasons. Here’s the thing too – I gave her advice that I could take myself.

Love can often get in the way, we often reach this lovely sense of comfort that can get in the way of the moment. The trick is to be confident within yourself to trust your partner and yourself with safety parameters.

So I guess I’ll begin again.

12 thoughts on “An Awkward Dominant on Hair Pulling

  1. I love my hair being pulled so much that I’ve never even considered that could be such a thing to struggle with for dominants…so thanks for this eye-opener! And for what it’s worth: If your kitten is wired just a little like me she’s gonna appreciate if you just go for it 😉

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      1. Really? I’m not sure I’ll be able to find the right words…can you tell me what you’d like to know? I really suck at just writing away, I’m better at answering questions though 😀

        I love that you wrote about it, just thinking about it made me smile 😉

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      2. I guess I’m just interested in what means for different people and in this case, what it means for you and why you feel it triggers such a reaction. I mean, sure, we could say hair pulling is hair pulling and it simply ignites a reaction to obide – but I wonder what comes about from the act itself? What images come to mind just thinking of it? Does it trigger something from the past? As a submissive – and I’m assuming, forgive me, – what is it you feel at the first tug?

        If these are all personal, don’t worry about answering and consider me just thinking out loud. Or feel free to email the responses! Whatever works!

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      3. Okay…I’ll give it some thought and come back to you, alright :)?
        Your questions really helped so thanks for your curiosity…I’m writing a lot but I’ve never written about a topic like this so it’s going to be interesting to see where this is going 🙂
        Oh, and also, you assumed the right thing 😉

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