Negative Thinking and Me

It’s always surreal when a reader or a lurker from the blog comments in on an old story and mentions I’m a good writer or that my words have helped them in some way.

Somewhere along the highway I’ve become predisposed to a negative outlook and am cautious to accept any positivity coming my way lest it leads me astray.

I realise that makes me a hypocrite in a way, not taking my own mental health advice to stay positive, but isn’t that the way with some of us? So eager to help and put faith in others and reluctant to take our own advice?

Last week I caught up with an old friend who I mentored in early 2017. It was a lovely chat, the kind where you feel like nothing has changed, you simply paused the conversation. Well, I had learned that the concepts I put forth to her had stayed with her. She had taken exercises I recommended, advice I had given, and still adopts these in her life daily.

I was, admittedly, a bit taken back. As a mentor, I figured I did help others in the moment but believed I would be of no more use after they grew. And then – see – came the negative thinking – who are you to lead? Who are you to teach? What can you possibly do? Maybe this is a fluke – I jumped from the positive to a negative.

I spoke to my dad about this on the weekend, my negative thinking. He says it’s part and parcel of the human condition but that you may grow out of it. I’m 31 now and I’m still interchanging positives and negatives depending on the day. Hm.

A favourite exercise of my kitten and one that some students I have helped mentor love is writing down three positive things that happened to you in your day to day life. Maybe I should practice that myself.

6 thoughts on “Negative Thinking and Me

  1. To me,we are all here for a life experience which includes emotions that we choose to believe are real or not..your reads have been a huge part of my evolving growth, as a submissive and now poly…because of my husband’s open mind we are now life partners..and not spouses that feel the need to live by the rules of society.. as true to myself as I’m aiming to be..I still have ups n downs.. The beauty of Dom/sub experience has changed my life beautifully, and reading the way you love your kitten is inspiring..compassion,empathy,unity and loving my sexuality along with meditation has given me a much needed balance.. And I thank you for the part you have impacted me with.. Sincerely, Victoria.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh gosh, I have? Well thank you so much for those beautiful words. I’m glad I could impact your life in such a positive way, for the both of you. I would love to hear more about how things are going for you if you feel open to sharing.


  2. I wrote a post called ‘Finding Joy in Gratitide’ where I explained how I use an app called Gratitude365 to try and record such things, plus a pic, and the effects of looking for the good stuff. I’ve let it go by the wayside recently and this reminds me to revisit it. I wonder why it is that is easier to think in ways that are less than joyful…

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I’ll have to download that app – and pass it on to kitten as well. It’s always a good thing even when you’re not thinking negatively at all.

      I’m sorry to hear you’ve fallen into the trap yourself. You’re such a beautiful person that hearing this makes my heart ache. I guess we are the type of people who care more about the people in our lives instead of ourselves.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I have found that most folks are able to give great advice to others but rarely able to apply it to themselves. Even to the point that the most troubled are the best advice givers and downright lousy in applying it as well.

    I trick myself for advice. What would I tell a friend if they asked about issue x, y and z? It works.

    And yes, do journal gratitude. And if you fail to journal it, think on it instead. If you can come up with three things a day to be grateful for, you are already ahead than I was when I started. My devotion to this single practice has worked wonders in my life.

    Liked by 1 person

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