Day 28 – Has your Dominance ever failed you? Have you ever been criticised or received negative feedback for your Dominance? Have you ever regretted your actions or emotions as a Dominant either in a moment or in a relationship? Have you ever looked back and realised you made a mistake and, if so, what lessons did you learn and how did you apply them?
Oh absolutely yes! Yes I have failed. Yes I have received negative feedback and yes I regret certain actions in a moment.
I think we all do. I think to err is to be human, or however it goes. But more importantly, I think it’s the way to learn. To improve yourself, to learn why things went wrong, where YOU went wrong. All these things and more.
There have been times where I’ve misread a moment and my Dom side has startled my kitten.
That look she gives me, the wounded, how could you do this? Look, that breaks my heart. Completely and utterly. In that moment, I’m destroyed.
It doesn’t happen as much as it did when we were first learning but there are times where I fail to read the moment. In that moment, we openly talk about the error I made or the miscommunication and we improve and move forward and I think that’s great.
And it would always come back to something I had said, which when released into the world was read a different way by my kitten. And when she mentions it, I can see where I went wrong.
What lessons did I apply? A personal one. For me to listen and be adaptive to encounters – whatever they may be at the time.
It also taught me to carefully consider my words and all possible alternative meaning to them before hand.