The Master Mentality (OR: The April Update)


How many of males (or females, for that matter) have passed through my blog and wondered on the difference between a Dominant and a Master?
Is there a difference, you might ask? I mean they are both Dominant.
You’re correct, of course. A Master is Dominant but not all Dominants feel like a Master!
But the difference comes down to the lifestyle — and indeed down to they submissive, whether they be slave, bottom or submissive.
And the difference is this: ideals, lifestyles and needs.

A Dominant and a submissive are wired differently than a slave and a Master. Sometimes, as I am coming to understand, they intercross. Which I’ll get to later I promise.
It all comes down to the mindset. What are the needs? How do you differentiate between the needs yourself? The latter question is a little hard to answer due to complexity but essentially it comes back to ideals, lifestyle and needs.

There’s a dynamic at play that operates on an entirely different level than a Dominant and submissive.
This dynamic gets complicated from person to person, as not only are we all different but what I say could mean something different to whoever reads this. It’s subjective, you see. And though debate can or will spark from it, neither one of us is wrong, as we are both right.

A Master/slave relationship, speaking a little from experience (I tend to shape shift between personas – more on that in a bit), is a 24/7 lifestyle. Where a ‘sub’ might negotiate a scene to play or choose when to submit in the first place, a slave willingly gives up control, with any rights to themselves being dictated by their Master.
Again, such a scenario evolves organically from person to person.

For me, they intercross. I’m a Daddy, I’m a Dominant, I’m a Master. Sometimes I’m only a Master, other times I’m just Dominant and in times that call or it, I’m a strict Daddy. My relationship with my kitten is 24/7 but she isn’t my slave. She follows rules and orders but our dynamic doesn’t always stray into Master/slave territory unless those personas connect like puzzle pieces. Are we just playing with the idea, is it just a scene, this M/s dynamic between us? No. It’s just part of the brew that is our personality. And this is why labels are headache-inducing.

It’s funny. I’ve spoken to women who discover they are a ‘slave’ because…it just feels right. They feel that need to serve. They can’t quite understand how a submissive chooses to submit when they are willing. And you know, it’s vice versa for the submissive people I’ve spoken to. It’s just part of the mindset within you and only you can decide or answer that for yourself.

So as a Dominant, I can understand a Master’s need. But I don’t want that all the time. That doesn’t mean I don’t want control, it means I don’t want kitten as my slave for the entirety of our time. Because eventually, I want to be in a different universe.

And this changes.

I could go months being in a Master mindset, from the time I wake, to the time I fall asleep. And we have surprised ourselves by living like this and controlling her life completely and feeling absolutely fucking beautiful. And then life dominates us, runs us down and we want to sink back into Daddy/baby girl mode, like some sort of shit hot car changing shifts.

So what is the difference between a Master and a Dominant? It’s the thought process, it’s the ideals, it’s the conditioning of a mind. It can be a part of you or it can be the whole.
Really though, these are labels. And doing what make you happy and fulfilled is the main point for you, dear reader.

5 thoughts on “The Master Mentality (OR: The April Update)

  1. What’s the difference between….what do the titles mean?

    I don’t think there’s any one cut and dry answer. Answers vary from person to person.

    I’m a submissive (one who chooses to give up power & control to a TRUSTED other), a Middle (a Little who is between 11-16 when in Little space; in my case, 15, a perennial high school sophomore); a masochist (one who gets off on pain). But I’m not in Little space 24/7/365, I don’t want or need pain every minute of every day. I also have some fetishes (for example, I like to wet myself sometimes & I like when my partner watches me use the potty).

    I am who and what I am. I like the things I like. I don’t care if a man wants to be called “Daddy”, “Sir”, “Master,” “Mister”, or what…I care about whether our play together is Safe, Sane, Sober, and Consensual; I care that he makes me feel alive and vibrant.


  2. I feel like you just explained my Master and I’s lifestyle exactly!
    It comes in shifts, in waves, as per the situation.
    Spot on! I love it! Thank you!
    Thank you for letting others know that they’re not the only ones!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Sir and I shift within our individual roles too…it just happens organically. People aren’t stock robots, we have natural tendencies to change and move. And yes…labels are headache -inducing! Lol! Great post!


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